Actions Speak Louder than Words
Each of us has a psychological construct I am calling your “Circle” that delineates those things that matter to you from those that don’t (even if you think they should).
So, what is in your Circle? You might think that knowing what is in your Circle is as simple as asking yourself what things in your life truly matter to you. But, we must be careful here, because the things we say are important are not always those things that are truly important. We can know what is truly in our Circle more by the actions we take than by the words we speak.
For example, suppose I tell you that it is important to me to lose weight. You would then assume losing weight is in my Circle. You would expect to find me eating salads for lunch, working out and counting my calories. However, if instead you saw me in the donut shop every morning eating donuts, you should properly assume that the enjoyment of eating donuts is truly in my Circle. I am only fooling myself about the importance of losing weight.
Think of all the things that people put in their life Circle.
Your circle can include your wellbeing. You might have dreams for your life that are important to you. If so, we would see you taking action to fulfill those dreams. You may have people you love in your Circle. If that is the case, we would find you looking out for them, showing them attention and caring for them. You may have education in your Circle. If so, we would find you studying and applying to school. You could have money in your Circle. If that is the case, you would be working your career track to maximize your income. You can have pleasure in your Circle, or athletic accomplishment, or almost anything. Or, almost nothing.